30 Days of Proverbs: November 4th

November 4, 2017

Proverbs 4: Wisdom Will Protect You

"Watch over your heart with all diligence,

For from it flow the springs of life." 

Proverbs 4:23

2017 has found me turning myself into a Grandmaw. Basically. 

At the beginning of the year, I set out to more closely examine the areas of my life I use to entertain myself. I figured I'd cull a couple shows from my Netflix line up and that would be about it. 

I WAS SO WRONG. 

Bless my heart. 

I did start there, and was pleasantly surprised to notice that after I'd desensitized my ears to profanity that now, IT HURTS MY HEART TO HEAR IT. But I was surprised when I put down a book my librarian recommended about 13 pages in because I could tell the characters were headed for some pre-marital "fellowshipping" and suddenly I realized that type of story line put a bad taste in my mouth. But that wasn't the hugest surprise. Not by a long shot. 

I DEACTIVATED MY INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT.

 I eliminated social media/time wasters from my immediate, easy access. 

WHAT ON EARTH WAS HAPPENING TO MY LIFE??

I noticed myself becoming increasingly unhappy with myself after watching friends and acquaintances and fancy, beautiful people online. They were doing yoga and running 5ks and renovating houses and buying farms with beautiful lakes and rolling hills while I was sitting here with 4 days of dry shampoo in my hair, hopelessly unable to touch my toes or run down my driveway without getting a stitch in my side and corralling tumble weeds of pet hair from under my couch every afternoon for funsies.  

It was filling my heart with poison. 

We bought our first iPad. It's a used one from a family member that we're using for school work and to watch YouTube videos of how canned pumpkin is made. I'd realized how much time I was slipping into (10 minutes here, 24 minutes there...) scrolling through Facebook or getting lost in Pinterest vortexes while the kids played. My heart was heavy over the neglect I was giving my family because I was distracted by the World Wide Web. So one morning this summer, I deleted IG, FB and Pinterest from my iPhone. I uploaded them to a folder on our new/used iPad, and that basically limits my time to access them to before the kids wake up and after they go to bed. I'll update things online sporadically some days, but since the iPad is usually plugged in on top of a bookcase, gone are the half hour vegging-on-the-couch sessions. 

AND I HAVE NEVER FELT BETTER. 

God opened my eyes to the ways I was filling my heart and I love the reminder these verses give me. When I'm not distracted by unnecessary things, my heart is happy, my parenting is more diligent and my self esteem stems from how closely I'm tethered to Him, not how Pinterestly perfect my life looks. 

I'm glad I'm learning, even if I'm a little late to the game, to diligently watch over my heart. 

Have a Christ-filled day, y'all. And thanks for stopping by~ Katie. 

30 Days Of Proverbs: November 3rd

November 3, 2017
Proverbs 3: Find Protection and Peace With Wisdom

"Do not withhold good from those whom it is due, 
When it is in your power to do it."
Proverbs 3:27

Ok, so I tell my kids "No" ALL THE TIME. 

Candy at 7:01am? NO. 

Scissors in bedrooms behind closed doors? NO. 

Using the water hose outside 20 minutes before we need to leave the house? NO. 

But there are some No's that aren't as black and white. I might say "No" to reading a book when I'm tired. I may say "No" to PlayDoh in the kitchen because I don't feel like sweeping up the mess afterwards. Don't even ask me to play Trouble because IT IS THE GAME THAT WILL NEVER END. Going to the park frequently gets pushed to the back burner because of the tumbleweeds of pet hair billowing across the living room because THE HOUSEWORK IS NEVER, EVER DONE. 

But these verses remind me that I should say "Yes" when I can. Is PlayDoh messy? Yup. But is it better than having the kids waste half an hour staring at Odd Squad? Absolutely. So today, I'll exhale more and work on gathering the patience and energy to say "Yes" when I can, even if it's not convenient. 

Have a Christ filled day, y'all. And thanks for stopping by~ Katie. 

30 Days of Proverbs: November 2nd

November 2, 2017
Proverbs Chapter 2: Wisdom Brings Security

"For the Lord gives wisdom,
from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.
He stores up sound wisdom for the upright;
He is a shield to those who walk in intregrity, 
guarding the paths of justice,
and He preserves the way of His godly ones."
Proverbs 2: 6-8

Ok, so this one is a straight up GEM. 

Homeschooling/motherhood has left me empty and answerless more than any other season I've encountered in my life. I pray for discretion and guidance and strength and wisdom about 1,483 times a day because there are moments when I have about a 0.003% clue about what I'm doing.

 I've got a reluctant reader and I've tried EVERY SINGLE TRICK IN THE BOOK to encourage them during Phonics. Games and tough love and sight words and blends and flash cards have left us miserable and defeated. Tears, OH THE TEARS WE HAVE SHED. God has had to hold my hand because if not, I would have either burned my dining room down around us or shaved my own head in desperation. 

These verses remind me to continue to look to Him for help and strength and guidance AND SELF CONTROL. Because while we're light years ahead of where we were, I've still got about 16 years of Homeschooling waiting ahead for me. SWEET MERCIFUL HEAVENS. 

Have a Christ filled day, y'all. And thanks for stopping by~ Katie. 

30 Days of Proverbs: November 1st

One of my favorite Bible study habits is to wrap up my reading with reading the date's corresponding chapter in Proverbs. With today starting a new month, I thought I'd create a sort of online journal of my favorite verses and thoughts through each chapter. 

If you'd like to read along, I'd love to have you join the conversation! 

NOVEMBER 1, 2017

Proverbs Chapter 1- Wisdom's Call

"Turn to my reproof, 

Behold, I will pour out my spirit on you; 

I will make my words known to you." 

Proverbs 1:23

I hate having my nose rubbed into my mistakes, WHICH ARE PLENTIFUL. I tend to immediately become defensive, combative, and offended when I recognize my character flaws or sinful behavior within myself or EVEN MORE SO when it's pointed out by someone else, bless their hearts. 

But this verse reminds me that good, Godly reproof refines me. His discipline makes me better. It helps me to track down, dig up and root out the parts of me that aren't reflecting Him. So today, I'll focus on listening to Him, humbling my heart to accept His direction and working to refine the habits I have that pull me away from Him. (I'm looking at YOU, Impatience and Perfectionism.) 

Have a Christ filled day, y'all. And thanks for stopping by~  Katie. 

My Last Little.

 I asked for the picture. 

He's four. Now his legs dangle below my knees when I pick him up. He builds teeny, tiny Lego cars and asks to read books about spiders and ants and machines that crush concrete. It's a process I recognize; it's a maturing I can see slowly unfolding in front of me. I'm bursting with pride to watch the little boy he's growing into, but my heart is tearing out because it's happening to my baby. My last little. My final act. When his head began to droop during our family devotional tonight, my heart warmed. I felt him shudder and exhale that one last wakeful breath as he relaxed into sleep onto me. I'd forgotten how long it had been since I felt that release. And I don't know when I'll see it again. 

So I asked for the picture. 

I Am The Prince Caspian of Homeschool Moms

Welcome, Prince," said Aslan. "Do you feel yourself sufficient to take up the Kingship of Narnia?" 

"I- I don't think so, Sir," said Caspian. "I'm only a kid." 

"Good," said Aslan. "If you had felt yourself sufficient, it would have been a proof that you were not." ~Prince Caspian, The Chronicles of Narnia

This is me and all my feelings at the beginning of every homeschool year. C.S.Lewis is INSIDE MY BRAIN. Again. He does that a lot. 

 I feel like I should clear the air a little. I am not some especially blessed, insanely patient Christian freak Mom who possesses some untold Mystery of The Universe that bestows upon me some magical qualifications that "enable" me to  homeschool. I mean, I wish there were some magical beans I could consume that would equip me to be some kind of SuperHomeschoolMom but thats just not realistic. Waaaaait- I just described coffee. So scratch that. 

Starting over: Just because we've decided to homeschool doesn't mean I somehow have it all together or that I've got the patience of Job or that I'm somehow superiorly qualified to teach my kids. I do have a degree in education, but let's be real: I haven't referenced a single portfolio case study or childhood psychology textbook or classroom management technique from any of my college classes in my homeschool career so far. Whew. Those binders are still tucked into my attic melting their lives away through every Florida summer. I've you've read any of my previous posts, you'll totally get my current humble state. I'm just a wife and a mom. I'm the most unremarkable woman you'd ever meet. (Secret: I WEAR SHOES THAT ARE ALMOST 15 YEARS OLD and I love them so much. Birkenstock Bostons- you will forever have my unwavering affection.) I use dry shampoo more than I'll ever admit. SO DON'T ASK. 

And while I am painfully ordinary, my Savior isn't. So what it does mean is that, despite the fact that home educating is long and hard and loud and draining and messy and overstimulating and early mornings and late nights and cry sessions behind a locked bathroom door and more coffee than any one human should ever consume- God has used it to make me better. It has broken me down and reshaped me in the best way life ever possibly could. I have had to stop and throw away the broken pieces of my pride and selfishness and inflated ego so often through this homeschooling journey and He has used those moments to refine me. 

Another year will start on Monday and I've been waking up in a panic with a mental To Do List scrolling through my brain at 4:45 every morning this week. There is so much to do. To plan. TO CLEAN. Every year I feel the same feeling: I don't think I can do it. AND I KNOW I CAN NOT DO IT- not without His sustaining care.

 I read Psalm 55 this morning and verse 8 is just my favorite: "Cast your burden upon the Lord, and He will sustain you..." Bless it, y'all- I need that verse so much in my life right now. I just love that promise. Sustainment. From Him! A continuous filling for the next 10 months is ready and waiting for me to ask for it. And I will. And I already did, actually! Wednesday night I made that long walk up the center aisle and asked our local church family to pray for me as we enter this new school year. I'm not sufficient enough to do this homeschooling thing, but I'm fortunate enough to know Someone who is. 

Here's to everyone beginning a new school year soon- He can help us do it! 

A Pep Talk For Myself

Sweet merciful heavens, y'all- I AM SO TIRED. 

This morning's current situation is brought to you by a nightmare, one set of leg cramps and TWO nosebleeds. I JUST WANNA CRAWL BACK IN MY BED.

We've got a slammed day (and all week, really) of end-of-the-summer stuff to do and when my alarm went off at 5:01am I SO MUCH wanted to throw my phone in the commode and go back to bed. But I didn't- I rolled outta bed, turned on the washer and dryer, poured a cup of coffee and curled up in my chair with my favorite ugly sweater to study The Word and talk about all my feelings with Him while the world was still dark and quiet. I'll post this, then I'll fix Matt's lunch and breakfast, then I'll head into my dining room to dig further into planning our school year. I'm busy and it's not even 6:00am. 

My point is this: would an extra 45 minutes of sleep this morning been awesome? YESSSS. But will I feel better after having spent time at His feet and preparing myself to serve my family today instead? ABSOLUTELY. It's so worth it. (I tell myself this as I smear Sunday's mascara all over my face on a Tuesday morning as I rub my tired eyes. Don't judge- I'm working on implementing a better skin care routine. BABY STEPS, Ok?)  

We can do it, Mommas! WE CAN DO THE HARD THINGS. The payoff will be worth the extra cups of coffee we'll need to combat the combination nights of interrupted sleep and early mornings. WE REALLY CAN!! So get up, get in The Word with some coffee and get ready to conquer today for Him! What hard things are you currently conquering? Can I pray for you about them? 

 ::pep talk completed:: 

Thanks for stopping by! ~Katie.